Victoria was the subject of this week's offering from LA, and boy, does she have eating 'issues'! Better leave it at that as don't fancy a journey through the courts for saying wht I think and paying the price. How scary is that? Have you noticed how I have cunningly not mentioned anyone by surname, so that the Vikki in question can never be sure I meant her? She does read my blog, btw. All the royals do.

I noticed today that the Queen uses Andrex toilet paper (shame on her green credentials). I noticed, not because she had a bit trailing from her shoe, or because I saw her changing a roll in the palace privvy, but because she puts her stamp of approval over everything she has ever touched.

I am writing live from Claygate, and you can't come here without coming near to Scouting. My pa is a Scout Extraordinaire, having been a memeber of 1st Claygate since Baden Powell was a lad. R and H and A got the tour of the new 'Scout Centre' ( NOT hut) this morning, I was excused as did it on a previous trip. It s all terribly complicated and more twisted than an Eastenders storyline, but the developer who built 20 terraced housed ( dahling - in Claygate - how dreadful!) on the old Hut site bought the land ( green belt - don't ask how) and built the new Scout Centre as part of the deal. So, we wandered through the new development on the way to the cinema last night. Nice. We could afford a garage - I looked in the property paper last time we were up. The rental prices per month in Claygate would be mistaken for house prices in Thornhill. Anyway, where was I - ah at the cinema.

Now, one of the best features of Claygate ( along with the countryside, high house prices and friendly American and South Africans who live there) is that you can walk to the cinema. It is in Esher, which makes Claygate look like a shanty town on its edge. Apart from the cinema and Waitrose, there is almost no other useful shop in Esher. OK, theres a Boots and a stationery shop. There are over 12 restuarants, plus pubs, a stockbrokers and a Costa Coffee. And a Christian Science reading room. But mainly you would go there to buy a house, if you are extremely rich. Or you would go there to go to the cinema. You need to be rich to do this too, as the 2 tickets came to £16. We had dinner out before hand as well, ( this was all part of our late anninversary celebrations), thus wiping out with one Italian meal the deposit for the garage.

In the olden days, when you could go to the cinema in Esher for £1.10 - my first film just with friends was ET - there were 2 screens. A massive one with velvet padding on the walls, and an upstairs one, which was squashed but ok. The big screen had a balcony too. Now, the Odeon have tried to turn it into a multiscreen, with the result that we sat in someones lounge to watch the film. The choices were Transformers, Simpsons or Evan Almighty. Now, Transformers obv no no for me, did toy with the Simpsons as had read good reviews but decided I coudn't bear a hour and a half of cartoons. so that left Evan Almighty. Now, there were lots of things I liked about Bruce Almighty, and although this was a sentimental, moralistic God bless America film, the main thing to like was still there. Morgan Freeman as God. Perfect. The intimacy of relationship with God that Evan ends up with seems to me to be worthwhile aiming for, if not building an ark as you go. The way he raises his eyebrows and smiles in a 'I love you and you make me laugh but in a nice way' - yep. And especially the full white outfit, reminding me of the new dad in the maternity ward when H was born, who had not yet learnt to wear beige, or mustard, at all times with a new born.

Have bagged another NT while up here - Polesden Lacey. Worthy of further explorations, on the North Downs, an incredibly steep valley side for Surrey, feels more like Switzerland. Very nice, well done NT. Also did Claremont again, but in the rain, and I spent the whole time the others were walking around the lake on my phone to my stockbroker. Doesn't count as we have done it before. Need to get some more NTs bagged before our membership runs out in November. Poor R.